Fitness that Fits in your Hand

When it comes to getting sweaty, going to the gym is pretty low on my list.  There are plenty of other activities I like to participate in that I can convince myself is burning calories.  Chief among them is eating super spicy food on the couch watching TV with the air conditioning off. Sure it’s economical but not as erotic as you were expecting.  To be honest, I’m betting there are a couple of you out there that can relate. {Read More}

Sunburnt Magnolias

You know you have a good perverted husband when I start quoting my favorite movie and he chimes in and makes it dirty. Ellen: “My colors are blush and bashful. I have chosen two shades of pink, one is much deeper than the other.” Mark: “I like pink! Pink is my signature color. If you show me your pink I’ll definitely make you blush and I won’t be bashful about it.” As I’m sure some of you will guess, that {Read More}

The Perfect 10

Previously…on a very special Living Clean and Dirty podcast. OK, everyone who knows me knows I love to recycle.  Whether it’s tin cans, shampoo bottles or toilet paper it doesn’t really matter to me.  In the spirit of recycling I have taken my 10-Step Commandments from our podcast and recycled/reused here in one nice neat package, I call it The Perfect Ten (no hubby, not you but you’re totally a strong 9…ok maybe 8).  Originally I called it the Ten {Read More}

Boom Boom Shake Shake the Room!

There are three words that this girl lives to hear.  That’s right…Pakistan, Magnesium and Iodine.  I used to think that maybe 2 of them were places that you can only get to by plane and one is something you put on cuts for some reason.  As I get older (read: wiser) I have come to appreciate that actually 1 of them is a place where something is mined and 2 of them are the mine-ees (miners, minors, ??).  That’s right {Read More}

You Must Tend Your Garden

When I was young and single, personal hygiene was at the top of my daily shit to do list.  Basically that means I was very attentive to “tending the garden”.  That’s just nice talk for shaving or waxing your bush so that when a guy got your pants off he didn’t think he was staring at Lenny Kravitz in a headlock.  And if by luck he was an overachiever and actually did try to find my clitoris I didn’t think {Read More}

So smart, It’ll make you cry

Do scallions work like onions and make you cry?  Ahh, who cares.  It got you to check out the article and the video below. Hi guys, I know you are all struggling along without your regular LC&D updates so I thought I’d throw you a quick one to hold you over.  Another tip from my kitchen and this is one of my favorites.  Add 1 part great vegetable, a cup of water, a dash of free and voila…magic scallions.  Doug {Read More}

Who gives a chip?

 Raise your hand if you like potato chips… (wow, that’s a lot of hands)   Now, I love processed foods as much as the next gal, but I also know how bad they are for you.  In my quest to give my kids the potato chips they craved and not turn them into those weird kids who never eat snacks, sweets and junk food I decided to try to make my own.  I read a ton of reviews of the {Read More}

Dancing with Jake Ryan

So there I was, a fresh-faced budding young woman of 14.  I was at the movies with some friends and that’s when I first saw him.  He became very important in my “formative years” and was often on my mind as I drifted off to sleep…Jake Ryan.  When Sixteen Candles came out in 1984 I thought the story was cute, the dress was awesome, but Jake was dreamy.  Somehow over the years his dialogue with Long Duck Dong blurred in {Read More}

Happy Earth Day 2015

Earth Day 2015! It’s like the Super Bowl of the Living Clean and Dirty regular season. It’s here! It’s here! No, this level of excitement isn’t about hump day or as I like to call it “Inappropriate Mortician” day but that’s moderately exciting too (Yawn)! I get more excited about this one day than I did when I got my first period (although looking back, “while roller skating in white pants” does not a special moment make…). But let’s not {Read More}

Not so Fast-Food

In the words of the great Ferris Bueller “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”  I equate this quote to my behavior at the dinner table at the risk of my husband associating this movie with things rapidly going into my mouth, I’m afraid he’d never be able to watch it with a straight face again.  Allow me to explain… When I was a kid I sat across {Read More}